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100. Muse – Knights of Cydonia

It's like a spaghetti western. In space. With lazers, probably. And maybe dinosaurs, I hear some dinosaurs too. To tell you the truth, I'm not really sure that this song is about anything in particular. But no other band on the face of the planet is trying as hard to be unabashedly, unequivocally epic as Muse. And whether you hear Clint Eastwood, the Death Star, or the stomping lizards from Jurassic Park in their music, there is no denying that what Muse are doing is huge.

Would any Muse fan say this is their favorite of the band's songs? No. I don't think so. I mean, they probably shouldn't. It's hokey and a little too long and a little bit of a Queen rip off (don't even get me started on Queen.) But more than anything else in the big book of Muse, "Knights of Cydonia" highlights who they are and what they do best. The giant guitars, the chugging bass, the whirl of electronics seemlessly plugged into traditional rock formats. The bravado, sweet jesus, the bravado. The swell of Matt Bellamy's Yorke-ian vocals, mimicking tremolo guitar lines. And a meaty, chills-down-your-spine climax that make the 3 minutes of otherwise inane bullshit oh so totally worth it.

The song opens with a tractor beam and horse whinnies, lazer zaps and a chorus of "Ya-Ya"s, and promptly moves on to even goofier territory. The galloping drum beat rollicks into the song and is met by the steam engine of pure-distortion guitar. There is no sound untweaked in this song, the vocals screeched in the background under layers of reverb. The arepggio electronics underscore a horn section playing in a vacuum somewhere, traditional instrumentation trapped in the air lock of this interstellar traveling rodeo. Then the meaningful in, oh, zero ways lyrics start. Some of this shit sounds like it's coming from The Sphinx in Mystery Men - "Don't waste your time or your time will waste you"? Yeah, chew on that reference.

But, come 3:15, it's worth it. The instruments, the noise, the bottom drops out and 1,000 Matt Bellamy's sing in faux-operato about standing up and fighting back, and, well, I kind of believe him. The electronics turn up 35 notches, the guitar comes tearing back in, and Muse unleashes an epic fury unlike anything else that came out this decade. It has it's downsides, obviously. But "Knights of Cydonia" has a payoff double that of any other Muse track, and shows off their muscle and teeth as well as their (occasionally) canderous Epic, and can't be denied for it's pure fist-pumping glory.